Mornings are omni-present, like old people and pigeons. They will always be there to ruin the weekend, regardless of who you are, and how you sleep.
Unfortunately, there are 2 separate groups of people, and they cope with mornings in their own definitive ways.
Group 1) Jump out of bed and immediately begin to form a mental list of how they can be optimistic and active for the next few hours, smiling at the world as they throw open their curtains and welcome the new day into their lives. They see the morning as this, a Lovely Summer’s Morning:
Group 2) Secretly curse whoever invented the alarm clock, and curl back inside their body-warmth duvets, and refuse to accept the inevitable aspect of their day which starts with moving. They see the morning as this, a form of burning Hell Fire intent on ruining your life:
For Group 1, I say to you, this might not help you in the slightest. For Group 2, this post is for you. I have devised a few simple method of survival for the ever-returning “Morning Feeling”.
1) If you have a pet, try purchasing a mega-phone, and recording the mating call of a bull elephant. Use this recorded sound and time it perfectly for when you need to be awake, so the noise will wake up your pet, causing them to tremble in fear, and decide that they will not be destroyed by getting into bed with you, and your face is the only place on which they will survive the experience.
2) Send an automated message to all of your non-single friends, informing them that you have some horrifically heinous act of infidelity their significant other has taken part in when they were at work, or some other time-consuming life event. The ensuing phone calls and text messages will inevitably wake you up. But don’t forget to tell them you just needed to be up earlier, and their love lives are in fact safe.
3) Position a bucket of iced-water above your significant other, ensuring that your alarm is set to the exact time you need to be awake, When your alarm goes off, they will undoubtedly move before you. What they won’t know is that the bucket has been tied to them, and when they move to wake you, they will get doused with ice and coldness, both making sure you are awake, and someone else is suffering with you.
I hope this has helped 
Farewell
x
